Synopsis Fail

[thessalian]

This is the part of the whole writing gig that blows dead goats for nickels.

I know that agents need a one-page or so synopsis of a book so that they know if they want to actually read the damnable thing. The problem is not writing the one-page synopsis. The problem is writing the one-page synopsis so that it actually intrigues anyone enough to make them want to keep reading and still cover the entire thing, from beginning to end. Synopses are not my strong point. They never have been and they probably never will be. To try to compress into a few hundred words what I originally wrote in something like 83k words ... and make it saleable...

I know the salient points. That's not the problem. The problem is still polishing them up so that I can produce those salient points with the same gloss and ... I dunno, sense of humour that I did the original material. It's got to be professional but it's also got to encompass the story's style as well as its plot. Otherwise, it's just another bloody urban fantasy/horror novel wanting into the market. I have no idea how to do this. I have been beating my head on it all day and I am not happy with any of it. So now I have an opening paragraph and a bullet-pointed list and it looks awful.

I know there are points that strongly set Chaos Magic and the whole City of Complications thing apart from others of its sub-genre. It's not first person narrative, for one thing - every other book of its kind seems to be. Butcher, Harrison, Richardson, Caine, Hamilton, even bloody Meyer all write first person narrative. I don't. I'm also more of an ensemble piece writer than most on the market currently; Gaiman doesn't do first-person narrative but the action is almost exclusively shown from the point of view of a single protagonist, whereas I try to catch it from the viewpoint of all five HIPPIE members. There are stylistic differences, the setting's not a mid-sized American city (Chicago, Detroit or Seattle, for example) and ... well, you know. Ambulatory teddy bears with a taste for human flesh. There are differences. But I need to highlight those while not wasting too much time on details so I can outline the damn plot.

I don't think I can do this, and maybe I'm just all mood-swingy but the whole thing makes me want to cry. I look at the synopses bits I've done so far and if I were an agent, I'd probably just sigh, groan, roll my eyes and pitch it. I mean, okay, maybe I'd read it because the urban fantasy/horror genre is pretty hot these days, but most likely I'd ask myself how this is different from the hundreds of aspiring books of this type out there and use the shiny self-addressed stamped envelope enclosed with the three sample chapters.

Maybe I'm being overly critical. However, that seems to be my job. I'll keep bashing away at it until I get it right but I also reserve the right to be unholy depressed about the whole thing.

Comments

[nutmeg3.livejournal.com]

If it's any consolation, you're not alone. I hear this all the time from authors and even added a query-letter-analysis service to my book doc business because of it. Good luck.