Fall into Darkness
Jul. 25th, 2001 03:58 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
thessalianWell, I actually tried it.
Some of this account is going to come from the point of view of the chibi, since I wasn't in any position to view this from the outside.
First thing I did was take off the piece of quartz I wear. Now, this piece of quartz I got awhile ago - it likes me. A lot. And tends to serve as protection. But protection wasn't something I wanted. (Before you scream, I had it nearby. I'm not that stupid.)
Then I lay down and tried the trance state. Fell into it almost immediately - my mind's been begging to do that all day.
The chibi says I mumbled, then proceeded to make some gurgling noises. Images went through my head - Ryu doing his drop-roll, the preacher at his house, thinking dark thoughts, Mamoru standing in a corridor of his house just watching... Then it was like a sword cutting into my head, and all I saw was darkness.
Then a darker sort of darkness swept over me, if you can understand that. I felt something lighter either trying to shove or drag me away, but I wasn't going to give up that easily, so I went straight into the dark and asked it what the hell was going on. (Doesn't that just sound like me?)
It wanted me. It wanted me badly, and I don't know why. It was like stepping slowly into a lake of pain, starting at the toes and working up. It got to the point where I knew where my body was because of the pain points but I couldn't move. At one point, I couldn't even breathe. There was that lighter thing to fall back on, but it got so hard... I wasn't sure I was going to be able to go back. And then ... the hold was less, and I could break out.
I figured out what happened. The chibi had called me, and I'd apparently answered in a voice not my own. I opened my eyes and I could barely think; I was more confused than I've been in a long time, and in no small amount of pain.
Well, I guess I have proof that this sort of thing is real. I mean, someone saw this happen this time. And I have the aches to prove it to myself, if I have doubts of my own. Something's out there, and it does not like me. It doesn't seem to like anyone I care about, either. I haven't felt something so dark ... well, ever. I got a taste with that rock, and a nibble when I tried this the first time. This time I got a lot more.
At least I got out alive, and I have the chibi to thank for it. I hurt, and I'm tired, but I did it. Now I just want to find out how to make it leave those I care about alone. That may kill me. Ryu seems to think it will kill me. But ... my loved ones ... facing that in their day to day lives?
One more time, for 'luck'?
*shudder*
Thessaly
Some of this account is going to come from the point of view of the chibi, since I wasn't in any position to view this from the outside.
First thing I did was take off the piece of quartz I wear. Now, this piece of quartz I got awhile ago - it likes me. A lot. And tends to serve as protection. But protection wasn't something I wanted. (Before you scream, I had it nearby. I'm not that stupid.)
Then I lay down and tried the trance state. Fell into it almost immediately - my mind's been begging to do that all day.
The chibi says I mumbled, then proceeded to make some gurgling noises. Images went through my head - Ryu doing his drop-roll, the preacher at his house, thinking dark thoughts, Mamoru standing in a corridor of his house just watching... Then it was like a sword cutting into my head, and all I saw was darkness.
Then a darker sort of darkness swept over me, if you can understand that. I felt something lighter either trying to shove or drag me away, but I wasn't going to give up that easily, so I went straight into the dark and asked it what the hell was going on. (Doesn't that just sound like me?)
It wanted me. It wanted me badly, and I don't know why. It was like stepping slowly into a lake of pain, starting at the toes and working up. It got to the point where I knew where my body was because of the pain points but I couldn't move. At one point, I couldn't even breathe. There was that lighter thing to fall back on, but it got so hard... I wasn't sure I was going to be able to go back. And then ... the hold was less, and I could break out.
I figured out what happened. The chibi had called me, and I'd apparently answered in a voice not my own. I opened my eyes and I could barely think; I was more confused than I've been in a long time, and in no small amount of pain.
Well, I guess I have proof that this sort of thing is real. I mean, someone saw this happen this time. And I have the aches to prove it to myself, if I have doubts of my own. Something's out there, and it does not like me. It doesn't seem to like anyone I care about, either. I haven't felt something so dark ... well, ever. I got a taste with that rock, and a nibble when I tried this the first time. This time I got a lot more.
At least I got out alive, and I have the chibi to thank for it. I hurt, and I'm tired, but I did it. Now I just want to find out how to make it leave those I care about alone. That may kill me. Ryu seems to think it will kill me. But ... my loved ones ... facing that in their day to day lives?
One more time, for 'luck'?
*shudder*
Thessaly
