California Dreamin' Day 11
Sep. 19th, 2004 11:44 amI believe I am going to be spending most of today doing the same thing as I was doing yesterday -- vegging out in front of anime with
happypickle. This prospect fills me with great joy because God knows I don't want to spend any more time running around like a headless chicken than I have to, given that I'm going to spent most of Monday packing, most of Monday night/Tuesday morning travelling and most of Tuesday entertaining myself at the airport. And then travelling some more. I think I've earned some immobility, given the amount I'm going to be moving in the next few days.
It's kind of okay because it's worth it. While parts of my holiday have been enjoyable, I've been having that "I wanna go hoooooooooooome!!" feeling that I just didn't have last time. Then again, last time I didn't have much of a home to go back to anyway, but let's leave that alone for the time being. The thing is that, despite these people being my oldest friends (technically, they're the ones I've been in touch with the longest), I actually feel more comfortable with the bunch from England.
I figured out why, too. There's a lot of reasons, but the main one is there's a lot less effort involved. There's no tension as we try to avoid verboten subjects; if one of those comes up, no one has to actually get into it. There are no land mines in Memory Lane, and we can walk along it happy as you please without fear. There's no tippytoeing around each other, worried about the effect of the next word. It's so much easier. Not that it happens with everyone I know, but there are subjects that, when they have to be addressed, are addressed with care and stress and worry. And they do have to come up sometimes, because of the sheer amount of fuck-up that occurs when they don't.
But funnily, I can have a certain level of closeness with the others without that kind of stress. Kat and Mark were so incredibly there for me when
cholten99 broke up with me; I don't know what I'd have done without them, even if I didn't take them up on the offers of support as often as Kat in particular made them. I can talk to them about things if I want to -- I just don't have to, and that makes all the difference.
cholten99 says they're looking forward to my return. They'll probably appreciate it even more when I come home with manga and copies of Haibane Renmei ... and the Tibetan Book of the Dead. ^_^ It's being a nice holiday (particularly since it's cooler here in SB than it's been in SF -- there were clouds yesterday!) but I really am looking forward to going home.
And in my one concession to International Talk Like a Pirate Day, especially for Toos...
"Have at you, you scurvy dog! Arr!"
*ahem*
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
It's kind of okay because it's worth it. While parts of my holiday have been enjoyable, I've been having that "I wanna go hoooooooooooome!!" feeling that I just didn't have last time. Then again, last time I didn't have much of a home to go back to anyway, but let's leave that alone for the time being. The thing is that, despite these people being my oldest friends (technically, they're the ones I've been in touch with the longest), I actually feel more comfortable with the bunch from England.
I figured out why, too. There's a lot of reasons, but the main one is there's a lot less effort involved. There's no tension as we try to avoid verboten subjects; if one of those comes up, no one has to actually get into it. There are no land mines in Memory Lane, and we can walk along it happy as you please without fear. There's no tippytoeing around each other, worried about the effect of the next word. It's so much easier. Not that it happens with everyone I know, but there are subjects that, when they have to be addressed, are addressed with care and stress and worry. And they do have to come up sometimes, because of the sheer amount of fuck-up that occurs when they don't.
But funnily, I can have a certain level of closeness with the others without that kind of stress. Kat and Mark were so incredibly there for me when
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
And in my one concession to International Talk Like a Pirate Day, especially for Toos...
"Have at you, you scurvy dog! Arr!"
*ahem*